When my husband made his Christmas list, I checked it twice to make sure Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 3 wasn’t on it. He’s not on the naughty list. But if he gets MW3 he will be, because it will cause WWIII in our house.
Unfortunately, besides the requisite new pair of slippers, it’s the only thing he wants. So I’ve been on damage control since Black Friday by telling his friends and family not to buy him that game. I think my mother in law is on board, since she blames the older version for her lack of grandchildren.
I know I’m not the only female praying Santa doesn’t leave the season’s most popular video game under the tree. As many other women have discovered, if a man gets Call of Duty, he’ll neglect all his other duties for months. That first generation of little boys who played Super Mario Brothers might have grown up, but they’ll never grow out of gaming. Now instead of their mothers telling them to quit playing and come down for dinner, their wives and girlfriends have to do it.
We exist between checkpoints and matches. While they’re planning attacks and scoping out the best sniper hideouts, we’re preparing dinner, paying bills, and walking the dog– with the unnerving sound of explosions and gunshots booming from the next room. But unless you construct a physical barrier between a man and his television, limiting playtime is impossible. After he beats the game, he can play infinate matches on Xbox Live with strangers from down south or little boys from England.
Even tried-and true-ways to his heart like these won’t get him to remove his headset:
Me: We’d better go. The movie starts in an hour.
Hubby: I’m in the middle of a match.
Me: We’re supposed to be at your parents house for dinner now.
Hubby: Let me get to the next checkpoint first.
Me: It’s late, I’m going to bed.
Hubby: Uh alright. I’ll be there in a few minutes.
As annoying as his gaming is, the worst part is that there’s nothing I can do that compares. There’s no amount of People Magazine discussion groups I can host or Teen Mom marathons I can watch that even come close.
And after he reads this, I’ll probably have to buy him the game after all.