Netflix sent this email to their 23.6 million subscribers today (including me) explaining that they’re increasing their prices:
Here’s a decoded version of their email which explains what The Netflix Team is really trying to say:
Dear Julie,
In an effort to receive more money from you each month, we have decided to separate our DVD and online streaming plans. Now you will pay more for the same services. Your price for DVDs and online streaming will now be 60% more than it was before.
Our increased salaries will take effect September 1, 2011. You don’t need to do anything to allow us to take more money from you. It took us a long time to craft this email, and we hope you will not cancel your subscription or tie up our phone lines with complaints.
Even though our prices are now significantly higher, we realize that we are still cheaper than other home entertainment options. Our business analysts are confident that you will continue your subscription; otherwise we would not have made this business decision.
(The original Netflix email did not include a closing, but I added one.)
Greedily yours,
-The Netflix Team
Those analyst think they are so smart, hopefully they loose like half there business and get pink slips. The streaming is BS anyways, full of old B rated movies. This is such a good review of that letter, im glad someone acknowledged greedy America with its pants down
Thanks for commenting Michael! You’re right on about the mediocre selection of movies on their streaming service. It’s like going through someones home DVD collection who only bough DVDs from the $5 bin.
I like your translation of the letter! Sadly, I don’t think they will loose too much business, because as you mentioned they are cheaper and more convenient than most!
Thank you!
I’m with you Gabriela–even if some members cut back on their subscriptions, or cancel altogether, Netflix’s new higher pricing will keep them profitable.
Hey, you’re hot and witty. Nice combo.
Hilarious. Maybe you’ve also seen this video?
http://www.homemediamagazine.com/netflix/jason-alexander-spoofs-netflix-price-increase-24650
If you can hang through the pre-roll, it is a nice accessory to your post.
That’s fantastic! I love the shot where they are trying to jam a VHS into a DVD player. Thanks for sharing. `
You could not be more right..